Hunger Games & Kim Kardashian

Yes, I went to see Hunger Games before I read the books (bracing for the pitchforks). Read the post called The Games of Hunger if you want my reasoning behind that. Also in that post, I shared a brief review of the movie itself but this one is simply for entertainment.

Knowing the immense amount of anticipation for the movie, my Mom and I ordered our tickets online beforehand. When we went to pick up our tickets on Thursday night, there were already several lines set up with about 50+ people waiting… about 7 hours before the first show. Dedication? Bandwagoning? Probably the latter.

The next night we go out to dinner and then go straight to the theatre to wait in line. We end up being 2nd in line with a pair of girls in front of us. My Mom whips out the third book in the Hunger Games book series and I eavesdrop and people watch.

The girls in front of us were chatting up a storm:
“Which district would you live in?”
“The Capitol of course. Fat people don’t live in the districts.”
“You can always tell people’s personalities by what they wear to the movies.”
“What do you mean?”
“Why do people get all dressed up to sit in a dark theatre for two hours?”
“Very true.”  
 
With it being the first night of the movie’s release, everyone was waiting in line to get into the theatre. Some people just did not understand the concept of waiting in lines (like Shawn from Psych). A LOT of people waltzed confidently up to the theatre doors only to be stopped by a theatre employee. The theatre employee would point over their shoulder at the long line behind them and their bodies would visibly slump down with their frowns. I know I shouldn’t laugh at their expense because I probably would have done the same thing…but I was sitting at the front of the line, so I laughed.
The real fun comes after this…well, not fun. It was more sad and ridiculous than anything else. We were let into the theatre and there was an actual stampede. I power walked to the door, leaving my Mother behind. Yes, I am the kind of person that would leave their mother behind for a good seat in a movie theatre. At ten bucks a pop, I am not playing (yuck. I hate myself for saying that) being facetious (dignity saved). That’s not the sad or ridiculous part….well, I guess that all depends on your perspective (sorry, Mom).
What was ridiculous was the conversation I overheard while we were sitting in the theatre waiting for the movie to start. We had gotten really good seats in the center of the theatre and soon after we got in, three girls plopped down loudly beside me. I didn’t make eye contact and I only saw what one of them looked like because soon after they started talking, I took out my iPad and starting writing down everything they were saying. Please also note that these three girls were louder than everyone else in the entire theatre (they might as well have been screaming into a microphone):
“How are you doing?”
“Do you mean me or my life? Cause if you mean me, I’m f-ing awesome. If you mean my life, than it f-ing sucks.” (I have a theory behind people who swear incessantly – they either don’t have the smarts to use words that actually describe their emotions or they are so insecure about something in their lives, they are trying to cover it up with swearing) (Also, I’m pretty sure your life and you yourself are in direct correlation to each other)
 
“Are you hungry?”
“No. I’m not that hungry. I ate a lot of bread earlier.”
(And then she pulls out a bag of chips and a Slim Jim)
 
“You know what I realized the other day?”
“What?”
“I’m almost 30.”
“So?”
“Kim Kardashian is almost 30.”
“Brittney Spears is almost 30.”
“I can’t believe I’m almost 30. I thought I’d be married by now.”
“We’re going to start you off on cats then.”
“I think I’m going to sell myself to someone in Russia .”
“Does it work the other way around?”
“You mean you want to buy one?”
“No, I want someone to buy me.”
At this point, I am using every ounce of strength to not pee my pants because I am doing that silent laugh where I just shake like I’m having some kind of attack. Seriously? And while she is saying this, she is using the Slim Jim as a pointer, waving it in her friend’s faces and then ripping off an inch with her teeth, talking with the piece of Slim Jim rolling aroud in her mouth. And you’re not married because?
 
“Hmm…forty minutes until the movie. Let’s check Facebook.”
“Yes! It’s been like 20 minutes since I last checked.” (Wow.)
“Woah! Your phone’s screen is huge.”
“Yeah, my phone could eat your sad little tiny iPhone.” (She then starts beating her friend’s iPhone with her own making gobbling and monster noises)
 
They spend the next twenty minutes talking about Kim Kardashian and her new nail polish. The girl sitting directly next to me talked about the process of making nail polish and how easy it was to make it in bulk and how Kim Kardashian probably didn’t even pick out a color, she just stamped her name on the label to make money.
“Well, why don’t you make your own nail polish then?”
“Cause I’m not a f-ing entrepreneur. Or Kim Kardashian. That’s why.”
 
Finally, to end this post: (spoilers) about halfway through the movie in that beautifully sad and serene scene when Katniss gathered the Queen Anne’s Lace and gently placed it around Rue’s body (by the way, she was my favorite character in the movie) to honor her, a baby was crying softly in the back of the theatre and the girl next to me screamed, “Shut Up!” The moving emotion, the tenderness of the scene, the poetry in motion was completely ruined by this irritating girl. The baby was not that loud and actually added a bit to the scene (in a weird way).  
Maybe my overall review of Hunger Games was skewed because of these girls or because I don’t see the hype or because the theatre was SUPER hot…whichever it was, those girls were sadly hilarious. Future generation of leaders, people – addicted to Facebook, Kim Kardashian, and the f-word. Oh, the youth of American, how we have fallen (too much?).
LOVE her. I am so sad she is not coming back! REALLY talented actress and a great character. Why are all the good one’s always killed off?
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